I love to read.

And before you run screaming from this "z'omg another nerd ass ben post, hey, he looks like harry potter, which is the only literary character i know of" post, I'm going somewhere with that. So, just a heads up.

I'm at a stage at my life when I'm faced with thousands of choices. Some are big, like subjects which determine the next 10 years of my life or so, and some are small, like whether to stay up 'till 2 am reading. And lots of people are giving me advice on these choices. Many, MANY people. I'm sure everyone who's reading this is going through the same thing, or will be very soon. The point I'm trying to make is while I appreciate the help, I'm sure you have a lot more experience than I do, but I need to make these choices on my own. Hell. No one who's giving me this advice actually reads this... Hmm.

Oh well. Moving on.

I'm going through changes, too. People I hardly see are coming out with things like "Hey, did your voice break?" or "damn you're tall" or "Oooh, spread a rumor about her, get her back for that." And it's funny, because about 3 years ago (maybe more) I started reading stuff. Just anything that I came across, and I read about a curious disease called puberty. And I can objectively look at my life, the decisions I'm making and how I behave in general, and compare it to all this shit I've read. It's funny, too, because I might yell at my parents (or feel like it) and think "damn, I didn't mean to yell then, what am I doing? They're really nice people, they don't deserve that." And I'll look at the past couple minutes, see what is classic text-book pubescent behavior, and laugh inside. Because when I was reading all this shit 3 or so years ago, I was thinking "hell, I'll never yell at my parents, they're too awesome." And I remember this, and laugh. It's funny. To me.

So I go to work, where everyone likes me. Not necessarily "damn i want that guy" like, but "damn, he's a nice person, I'm gonna talk to him" and the interesting thing, I think, is that there's no other guys around their age to talk to. I've finally figured it out. They're (odds are) only talking to me, because there's no other dudes there to talk to. But then they get to know me, and think "wow, he's nice" and keep talking to me, I hope, anyway. I mean, if they were just some random person I didn't know, and they saw me, they'd probably laugh (like a lot of people do, I've noticed). I probably would too, seeing the spitting image of Harry Potter walking down the street towards me. But personally, I think that I look more like Seamus Finnigan, at least without my glasses. The movie one.

Without my glasses, anyway. Just an opinion. Thanks Wikipedia.

Wow, so off topic. Then again, there is no topic in this post, so I can't BE off topic, can I?
Where was I?

Oh yeah, people laughing.

So, they'd probably see me and laugh, like lots of other people, and it's funny that only when they're almost forced to talk to me that they actually see how "nice a person I can be." Don't ask why that's in quotation marks. Just don't.

Anways, the main point of writing this was, IMO, to say that I'm going through some changes (physical, and mental, and social probably) and I think it's funny that I can look at what an ass I can be sometimes, know what I'm doing and why, yet I can't stop it. Hehe. Maybe I just have a warped sense of humor. Maybe I just shouldn't post this, I think I touched on a few issues. I also think I used the letter "I" more than the other 25 combines. Well, it's my damn blog, I'll do what ever the hell I want. I'm gonna count those "I"s though. Wow. 50 "I"s.

Anyways, that'll do me, methinks. Au revior,
Ben

BTW, those I's only included I, I'm, I'll, etc, and only when it was me saying it. The count also ended at the 50 I mark.